"Pop! Pop!" - OFL Week 3

Here's my Operation Fear Liberation (OFL) snapshot for the third week of January. Once again, I've forced myself to do something new.  This one was edible.

Week 3: DIY microwave popcorn in a brown paper bag

Why it’s on my list: I love freshly popped popcorn with tons of sea salt and butter.  I often pop it in a pot on the stove top, but I worry that I’m damaging the bottom of my pot when I jostle it on my stovetop’s coil burner. True, I could pick up the pot to shake it, but that takes so much effort.  Plus, I still have to clean the pot afterwards. 

 

And I’m not really that mad about packaged microwave popcorn.  It just doesn’t taste as good.  This may be related to the fact that I burn packaged microwave popcorn 70% of the time, but I still find something lacking in the flavor department during the 30% of the time when my packaged microwave popcorn emerges without char. Plus, there’s the whole safety thing: a FDA report suggested that the chemical coating in the bags breaks down when heated into perfluorooctanoic (PFOA)—a likely carcinogen, according to the EPA.  And then there’s the debate about diacetyl, an FDA-approved chemical often used in microwave popcorn’s artificial butter flavoring. The extended inhalation of fumes from this chemical cause the debilitating respiratory disease commonly known as “popcorn workers lung” due to the number of microwave popcorn factory workers afflicted. 

Considering all of that, I’ve seen this simple recipe for DIY microwave popcorn in a brown paper lunch bag at least a dozen times over the years in cooking and DIY magazines and online.  No chemical coating, no artificial butter fumes, no processed flavor, no pot to clean, no strenuous jostling.  Plus, it’s loads cheaper than buying boxes of Orville Redenbacher Microwave Popcorn. 

Hang Ups: I suppose I had some tiny degree of fear about the staples causing an explosion in my microwave.  Or the bag bursting into flames.  But really, I don’t know what the big hang up was—I just have never gotten around to doing this one.

A deep and smoky fear (image by heb@Wikimedia Common)

Conquered: Thursday, January 19 (on National Popcorn Day, no less).

Where: my kitchen.

How: I tossed 1/4-cup popcorn kernels with a teaspoon or so of olive oil in a bowl. (Canola oil or butter could work too.  I’ve also heard that you don’t actually *need* the oil, so nonfat popcorn is possible.)  I added a teaspoon of freshly ground sea salt and a pinch or two of dried rosemary for flavor.  

This is all you need. And the measuring cup is optional!

I then poured the oiled & seasoned kernels  into a brown paper lunch bag, folded the top of the bag, and stapled it closed. If you fear of staples in the microwave, masking tape works too.  Or you could just fold it over a few times and leave it unfastened. 

I set the microwave for five minutes on high.  And then I stood a few feet back and waited until either the pauses between the pops lasted over five seconds or I smelled the slightest trace of burnt popcorn in the air.  I perceived both at the same time around the 4-minute mark and flung open the microwave door. You can check out a more official recipe here. 

The Experience: My DIY microwave popcorn did not, in the words of Magnitude, "Pop! Pop!" with the consistency that I’ve experienced on the stove top or with packaged microwave popcorn.  There was no big flurry of popping; rather, the pops began around the 1m30s mark and continued in a steady trickle, with a pop or two every 2 to 4 seconds.  It felt like the pauses were becoming more pronounced, and I really thought I smelled burnt popcorn when I threw the microwave door open and ceased cooking.   

But when I took the bag out, I could tell that there were a lot of un-popped kernels inside. Opening the bag confirmed this. I think a quarter of my kernels popped, resulting in about two cups of popcorn. Sad face. I’m not sure if the relatively ancientness of my microwave or my listening/sniffing for done-ness technique was to blame. Or maybe there is some awesome science involved in the way Orville Redenbacher packages their microwave popcorn that allow such synchronicity and widespread popping.

Zoinks! That's what I did wrong! I forgot the CIA-contracted laser!

The Verdict: I’m glad I finally tried it.  But I’m sticking with the pot on the stove top from here on out.  At least until I get another microwave.